so I was reading a blog post the other day about what it feels like to be married, and it was interesting. They talked about fights, shouts, slammed doors, etc. that was interesting to me…
My single friends often ask me what it feels like to be married, and it’s hard to explain, because sometimes people don’t believe me… It’s been really really good. I mean the other day I was thinking about traveling for work, and being apart from my husband for a few days and I felt sad, I even started tearing up… that’s how much I enjoy being with him. When he comes home late from work, I miss him so much, it’s so weird to have someone sharing life with you, who you thought you never even needed, and now all of a sudden you can’t imagine life without them.
A friend was asking me about food the other day, and I just smiled, I can never be hungry when my husband is around. He always makes sure I have something to eat, no matter how it inconveniences him… I guess I’m just saying that being married has been such a good good experience.
Before I got married I was nervous about so many things, the adjustment, the challenges, the fights etc. and for some reason, we never really had an adjustment phase, we just kinda fit together, made rules together, made plans together.
People often ask about the fights, I mean two people have to fight right? Well the truth is that you need two people to fight, and my husband always refuses to fight with me, and I refuse to fight with him. So whenever we have disagreements, we just pause until we can discuss it without getting angry, and then resolve, or agree to resolve later, or just decide perhaps there is no resolution, and just let the person do whatever pleases them. Some people may say that we bottle up our emotions, but anyone that knows me knows that I don’t bottle up anything. We discuss everything, let what needs to be let go, and just move on…
So what would be the secret? I would say for me it was marrying a mature man, who was ready to be married, and to do whatever it takes to make the marriage work. We will soon be hitting our tenth month together, so I definitely cannot claim to be an expert. All I’m sharing is that the first year does not have to be turbulent, nor the second or the third or any other year for that matter…
Neither one of us is perfect. I’ve had my days when I’ve been frustrated with things or people, or everything…I’ve had my crying days, my tired days, my sick days, but I always knew that in his arms I would have comfort…even when I knew he couldn’t solve all my problems…
so ladies, don’t believe people when they say marriage is tough, or it’s hard work, or the first year is rocky. It doesn’t have to be… you need to do things to please your spouse, but that’s not hard work, because it’s good for you too…
And ladies, don’t rush into marriage, don’t rush into relationships, don’t rush into anything, because in the end, I’m glad I didn’t marry all the other guys that came before him…yeah they were okay, but it would never have been as wonderful as this…Never.
One of my favorite books about marriage is the Happy Wives Club. I pray it blesses you as much as it blessed me.
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